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I'm a Monster


Alexandria Carlile is Austin Carlile's cousin. She's twenty seven and lives in San Diego California. Alexandria is the lead singer in a band called Reckless and Avenged. Alexandria has had some hard years. Her boyfriend broke up with her since he thought that she was gone too much on tour. Alexandria dealt with this through drugs and drinking. Will falling in love with one of her cousin's bandmates help her with dealing with her past, or will it just add to the pain.
- warning: there may be smut and there will most likely be triggers-
I apologize if any of these ures pictures are of you or anyone you know. I own nothing but the band Reckless and Avenged and the band members.

Alexandria Carlile. (also called Lexi, Lex, Alex)26 years old. clean/ unclean vocalist for Reckless and Avenged.

Gunner Taylor. 26 years old. lead guitarist for Reckless and Avenged. Alexandria's best friend.

Beck Carter. 29 years old. The drummer in Reckless and Avenged.

Krys Skinner. 25 years old. Rythm guitarist in Reckless and Avenged.

Levi Halert. 26 years old. Bassist for Reckless and Avenged.
Of Mice & Men. You know who they are. ;) Austin is Alexandria's cousin. Alan might have a potential romantic relationship occuring between himself and Alexandria!
Pierce the Veil. You know who they are! Maybe there might be a romantic relationship between Alexandria and Mike.

I've written fanfictions before, but this is my first Of Mice & Men fcanfiction. Im going to be writting this as I go so there's no definite ending yet. I really hope you enjoy this and please comment on if you like it and your general thoughts on it and what should happen later on.

Other bands such as Asking Alexandria, Sleeping With Sirens, Black Veil Brides, Falling In Reverse, and Bring Me The Horizon will be in the story either later on, or just in small parts.
So, this is why the story might be on other fanfiction sites.


Alexandria Carlile

Alexandria Carlile

Alexandria Carlile is Austin Carlile; from the band Of Mice & Men, cousin. She is the clean/ unclean vocalist for Reckless and Avenged. After her boyfriend; Jax, breaks up with her and says some vicious things, she spirals out of control and starts to drink excessively and starts to take drugs. She has something going on with Alan Ashby.

Beck Carter

Beck Carter

Beck Carter is the drummer in Reckless and Avenged. Like the other guys, he will do anything to stand up for Alexandria. He can be a bit of a goof off and loves to party.

Gunner Taylor

Gunner Taylor

Gunner Taylor is the lead guitarist for Reckless and Avenged. He is Alexnadria's best friend and will support her throughout all her decisions. He just wants whatever is best for her.

Kyrs Skinner

Kyrs Skinner

Krys Skinner is the rhythm guitarist for Reckless and Avenged. He is willing to stand up for Alexandria and he loves to have a good time.

Levi Halert

Levi Halert

Levi Halert is the bassist for Reckless and Avenged. He will always stand up for Alexnadria and loves to have a good time and party.


  1. Maybe It's Not My Weekend

    song title: All TIme Low "Weightless"

  2. To Just Indulge, Even If It Kills Me

    title credit to Asking Alexandria "Another Bottle Down"

  3. I've Lost My Goddamn Mind

    chapter title credit to: The Drug In Me Is You by Falling In Reverse

  4. Maybe Next Time I Wont Throw It All Away

    chapter title credit to: Would You Still Be There by Of Mice & Men

  5. I'm Sick of This Feeling

    title credit to Of Mice & Men "Break Free"

  6. Until I Found Myself In You

    title credit to Of Mice & Men "O.G. Loko"

  7. The Roof Is Crashing Down

    title credit to Bring Me the Horizon "Home Sweet Hole"

  8. Watch You Take The Fall

    title credit to All Time Low "Break Your Little Heart"

  9. I Won't Lose My Head

    title credit to Falling In Reverse "It's Over When It's Over"

  10. Take Away All Of This Emptiness

    title credit to Of Mice & Men "Another You"

  11. There Has To Be A Better Way

    title credit to Bring Me The Horizon "Visions"

  12. Im Admitting Know That I Have A Problem

    title credit to "I Have A Problem" by Beartooth

  13. Just Trying To Figure It Out

    title credit to Black Veil Brides "Lost It All"

  14. Tearing and Ripping the Seams of My Life

    ttitle credit to Of Mice & Men "Glass Hearts"

  15. Drenched In My Pain Again

    title credit to Green Day "Wake Me Up When September Comes"

  16. Lost And Sick In This Dying World

    title credit to Of Mice & Men "Second & Sebring"

  17. Free To Live Without My Fears

    title credit to sleeping with siren, "free now"

  18. But Honestly I'm Happy

    title credit to tonight alive "starlight"

  19. I'm Choking On My Words

    title credit to bring me the horizon, "The Sadness Will Never End"

  20. You Know Me Better Than Myself

    title credit to Of Mice & Men "public service announcement"

  21. I Beg For Just One Reason To Give You Regret

    title credit to asking alexandria, "A Lesson Never Learned"

  22. Let's Rip Out The Pages Of Yesterday

    title credit to bring me the horizon "suicide season"

  23. Losing Control

    title credit to young the giant, "cough syrup"

  24. I Have Lost, And I Have Loved

    title credit to bring me the horizon, "Diamonds Aren't Forever"

  25. I've Made My Bed, So I'll Lie In It

    title credit to bring me the horizon, "The Comedown"


    Sorry, this is not a chapter.

  27. I'm Just So Sick Of Going Home

    title credit to bring me the horizon, "Death Breath"

  28. This is not a chapter

    Please read


I think her and Alan should fix things.

I think Alex and Alan should slowly fix things.

He better have waited for her or else I'm going to be super passed! I love this story by the way it's written really well.

It would be the biggest plot twist if he were with someone.

This is excellent!